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Unfortunately Born

from The Cold Boy and The Deliberate Muse by C. Kiten

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lyrics

I wish I had a brother.
A brother, just like me.
I wish I had a brother to tell me exactly what he means.
I wish I had a sister,
to write everything down.
I wish I had a sister who would tell me not to fret when he left town.

I wish I had an answer.
An answer to soothe me.
I wish I had an answer that would keep me from this violence,
and set us free.
I wish that you would think.
I wish your mind was pure.
I wish there was a way for me to know just what is alright,
but nothing kills me more.

They built a wall between us.
I tried to tear it down.
And I think I did a good job, but there's just one brick left,
and let me tell you, it is loud.
It isn't made of rock,
No, it isn't made of stone,
but it's made of grace and smoke and scents and sighs that chill me to the bone.

I wish I wasn't strange.
I wish I knew that fire.
I wish there was some way for me to understand you,
except sit here and listen to you talk about desire.
I wish that you would just grow up.
Or at least, I didn't, either
I wish I knew who you were before you met me,
and how I proceed from here...

There's a woman in the country,
dressed a dark purple gown,
and she is fine, and she's happy,
even when no one's around.
There's a girl in a town,
sitting on a purple floor,
and she is humming to herself sadly,
wishing, wishing, you were more-
There is a lady in the city,
watching over a child,
and she is fine, and she's happy,
and she'll come home and be proud.
There's a girl in a town,
sitting on that very floor,
that you dreamt of last night,
when you walked through the door,
You were there with your friends
and we had to leave the room
because they were getting loud
and you wanted, you wanted them to know.
Why you're here.
And I just wanted to let go of all that fear.
And the entire wall was gone.
And the grace, and the smoke had returned
to where the kids are born,
where the kids are born,
where we all are so unfortunately born.

credits

from The Cold Boy and The Deliberate Muse, released November 22, 2019

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C. Kiten Los Angeles, California

Brittany Scheffler

Stormy alt-folk/post-sadcore from your penpal across the earth.

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